My aunt died this week. Everyone has been saying I am so sorry for your loss. This comes from a place of kindness. However, every time someone says this, I feel alone. I feel alone because I don’t feel such a huge loss. I know she is still here. I have already had a couple of messages that show that she is having a ball in heaven. And that she is even relieved to have left what she called the human madness. She was never one much for the physicality. She was an intellectual.
What pains me is the pain I feel from my cousins. I wish I could tell them, your mum is fine. Of course you still miss them. I still miss my Dad. I miss his smile, his voice, his presence, his jokes. I miss having him around. The truth is, though, I am probably closer to him now than I was when he was on earth. We had grown apart. I lived thousands of mile away from him but more importantly, we had radically different views of life. And now, my aunt will be closer to me too.
She said to me, through an intermediary, that she wants to help. And frankly, I am thrilled. I can now access her higher self. She can now witness my kids growing, my life, my dreams, my achievements in ways that she could not have done when she was earth bound. And she is not going anywhere soon. This a misconception. Our loved ones in heaven do not need to be left to rest in peace. They are not dead. They are very much alive and still interested in what goes on on earth. They are literally always only a thought away from us. Us thinking of them pulls them towards us. And there is nothing wrong with that. We are not doing anything wrong by wanting him them to stay close to us.
What happens however, is that our grief, our doubts, our constant mental noise, stop us from hearing back or feeling them, most of the time. Whereas when they are physically present, it’s much harder not to notice them. But in the physical world, sometimes we failed to find the time to go and see them. So it’s still the same. So we miss them, because in order to feel them, we need to turn the volume down of the constant entertainment hub that our lives are. I am guilty of this as much as any of you are. Life is so busy. I struggle most of the time to keep on top of the things I have to do. But when my Dad was alive, I didn’t have the time to go visit him. I didn’t make the time.
Making time for our loved ones is so important. And I am so glad I had a chance to see my aunt a couple of months before she died. And in truth, I tried to visit her every time I went to Paris. We had a good chat and a laugh. We learnt to appreciate each other. My father’s death brought us closer. We both loved him so dearly. We need to stop treating people like they are going to be here forever. At the same time, we need to know that they are here with us forever.
To your spirit team
(c) Ange de Lumiere 2017